Eshel Out Loud
News, Views, and Updates from the Eshel Community
Lessons from Yonah
When I learned about Yom Kippur in day school, I was told of a magnificent judge in the vast heavens, passing verdicts on the other side of slowly closing gates. These verdicts determine the trajectory of our entire next year. Perhaps, if our prayers contain the requisite power, our kavanah will elevate them high enough [more]
Finding My Voice
As a closeted Orthodox kid, I internalized explicit and implicit messages about my identity that led me to self-censor various forms of expression, out of fear that doing so would expose that I was gay. Weekly, this fear would manifest at my family’s Shabbat table, a time and place usually filled with great food, bonding, [more]
We Don’t Grieve Alone
It is not good for humanity to be alone. לֹא־טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ Loneliness is the first aspect of creation judged to be bad by God. Yet it is this deep sense of loneliness we are called to experience on Tisha B’av. אֵיכָה יָשְׁבָה בָדָד - How lonely sits the city once great with people. [more]
Three Weddings, One Marriage
I was married three times, to the same person. Our first wedding was almost everything I could have hoped for - spiritual, communal, religious, and deeply meaningful. The only problem was that legally, it was meaningless. In 2004, Mara and I got married in front of 240 of our closest friends and family. It marked [more]