Eshel Online

Eshel Baltimore/DC Parents & LGBTQ+ Joint Meetup
2023-04-19 19:00 - 21:00 (America/New_York)
Get together with our Baltimore/DC Eshel family. Join us in this intimate, confidential setting to meet others, like yourself, in the extended Eshel network.
WHAT: A private gathering for LGBTQ+ individuals who are Orthodox, Ortho-curious or formerly Orthodox and for traditional Jewish parents of LGBTQ+ people who may be struggling with their child’s sexual orientation or gender identity and/or wish to connect with other parents like themselves.
WHEN: Meetings are usually held on the first Wednesday of every month, 7:00-9:00 pm.
Where: For notifications and sign-in information, please register below, if you haven’t already. (You only need to register for this group one time.)

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Thanks to Our Baltimore/DC Sponsor

Eshel Parents Chaburah Group
2023-04-19 21:00 - 22:30
The Parent Chaburah Group meets on the Third Wednesday of each month at 8 pm Eastern, 7 pm Central, 5 pm Pacific Time.

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Closeted in Crown Heights
2023-04-27 20:00 - 21:30, 2023-10-11 20:15 - 21:45
In our community, there are many women who feel vulnerable and that they have much to lose if they come out: a job, housing, children, or family. This group is here to provide mutual support and unconditional love no matter where your journey is leading you. This support group is a non-judgmental space – there is no pressure to change your situation unless you want to.
This group might be for you if you:

Are a woman in the closet
Are married or divorced
Have children
Are afraid of what you might lose if you come out

This is a confidential group. Respect for each others’ desire to remain confidential or anonymous is of the utmost importance.
This group will meet in person in Crown Heights, but participants living in other locations are welcome.

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2023 Eshel Parent Retreat
2023-05-04 - 2023-05-07
Join us for the 10th Annual Eshel Parent Retreat!
Riding the Waves: Parenting an LGBTQ Child in Orthodoxy
Whether this will be your first parent retreat or your tenth, join us to be engulfed within a supportive, embracing, and nonjudgmental community. Whether you feel like you are struggling to keep your head above water or are going with the flow, this is a confidential space where we can grow together.

Join the Waitlist

Sponsor the Retreat

Scholar-in-Residence: Rabbi Dr. Kenneth Brander
Rabbi Dr. Kenneth Brander is President and Rosh HaYeshiva of the international Ohr Torah Stone network of 31 educational institutions including high schools and post high schools, leadership programs for men and women, outreach initiatives in Israel and throughout the world, and a social action center to represent agunot worldwide. Prior to making aliya, Rabbi Brander was Vice President for University and Community Life at Yeshiva University (YU), taught rabbinics at the Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary (RIETS). He served as the senior rabbi of the Boca Raton Synagogue from 1991 to 2005, overseeing its explosive growth from 60 families to more than 600 families. Rabbi Brander is a 1984 alumnus of Yeshiva College and received rabbinical ordination from RIETS as well as a special ordination from the Machon Puah center of medical ethics in Israel, and from then-Chief Rabbi Mordechai Eliyahu, in the field of medical ethics, reproductive technology and halakha. Rabbi Brander also holds a Ph.D. in general philosophy and comparative literature.

Highlights of the Annual Parent Retreat Include:

Spirited Shabbat davening
Thought-provoking sessions led by Rabbis, doctors, social workers, and more
Chaburah groups to share experiences with a small group
Finding a community of other parents with similar experiences

Plus, special guest appearance this year by comedian Leah Forster, creator of Tichel Tuesdays.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this retreat for me?What will happen this weekend?What does Capital Retreat Center offer?Where is the retreat? How do I get there?When does the retreat begin and end?What are the rooming options?What COVID precautions will be in place?Is there financial aid available?

Whether you are accepting of your LGBTQ child or struggling with their identity, or somewhere in between, this is the place for you. No judgments will be made about any retreat participant’s levels of acceptance of their LGBTQ child’s identity. We only ask that each attendee agree to respect other participants’ feelings and attitudes. Each parent and family is on their own journey, which includes many detours, twists, and turns. Come with an open mind and remember that everyone’s path is unique. We take confidentiality very seriously. All participants must agree and sign Eshel’s confidentiality policy. Retreat attendees may not disclose the identity of anyone else without explicit permission. Participants can only share what they hear at the retreat with an individual’s permission.

We will create a comfortable, confidential place to share. We will offer sessions on a variety of topics – previous highlights have included panels and workshops on language, mental health, dating and marriage, extended family, as well as navigating shuls and schools. We will share Shabbat davening and meals together. Throughout the weekend, parents will take part in a small chaburah group, providing an opportunity to check in and process what we are learning and experiencing.
Weather permitting, we will offer separate swimming hours in the outdoor pool, as well as outdoor walks, sports, and yoga.

Modern conference facilities
Delicious kosher food under Star-K supervision with Cholov Yisroel options
Shomer Shabbat environment with an expansive eruv
Beautiful natural surroundings

Capital Retreat Center is on the grounds of Capital Camps at 12750 Buchanan Trail East, Waynesboro, PA 17268
Conveniently located an hour and a half from Baltimore and BWI airport and train station
A 3-4 hour drive from New Jersey and New York
Directions to Capital Retreat Center
If you need help getting to the retreat, please reach out to us

You should plan to arrive between 3 and 5 pm on Thursday. Mincha will be at 5:15pm and the first session will begin at 6pm. Early or late arrival can be coordinated; email info@eshelonline.org to arrange. The program will conclude no later than 1 pm on Sunday.

Capital Retreat Center’s Nesiyah Lodge offers hotel-style accommodations with individually controlled heat and air-conditioning, hotel quality queen size beds, as well as linen and towel service.
Retreat attendees can opt for a private or double room.
All rooms include two queen beds, a private bathroom, desk, phone, and wireless internet.

We will continue to follow CDC and local guidelines. We recommend vaccines, and participants are welcome to mask during the retreat based on their comfort level. Being up to date on vaccination and wearing a high quality mask significantly reduce the risk of transmission and the severity of infection. We are monitoring the situation closely, and we will let attendees know closer to the time of the retreat about expectations for testing.

If you’d like to set up a payment plan in order to pay for the retreat in installments, please email sara@eshelonline.org. If you are in need of further assistance in order to be able to attend the retreat, please email miryam@eshelonline.org.

Pre-Pride Shabbat Dinner
2023-05-12 18:30 - 22:00 | JCC in Manhattan, 334 Amsterdam Ave. at 76th St., New York, NY, 10023
Register

Sponsor

With Pride Month just around the corner, we couldn’t wait to get the community together! Get a taste of Eshel’s famous LGBTQ retreat with this Orthodox LGBTQ-inclusive Kabbalat Shabbat and dinner on the Upper West Side. Whether you’ve looking to meet new friends or you’ve been to many Eshel events and want to reconnect, you are welcome here! This is the place to connect with other Orthodox LGBTQ Jews.
Where: Marlene Meyerson JCC Manhattan
334 Amsterdam Ave at, W 76th St, New York, NY 10023
When: Friday May 12
6:30PM Kabbalat Shabbat
8:00PM Dinner
If you’re coming from farther away and need help finding a place to stay for Shabbat, we will do our best to connect you with attendees who have volunteered to host people. Please email info@eshelonline.org to request a host, and specify gender, host genders you’d be comfortable with, any accessibility needs including type of bed/couch/air mattress, and whether you’d also need to be hosted for shabbat lunch. We value confidentiality at Eshel events. Please keep in mind that hosts may have roommates who are not affiliated with Eshel.

Registration is closed – Shabbat shalom!

Celebrate Israel Parade
2023-06-04
Join the LGBTQ+ Cluster for the Israel Day Parade in New York City on June 4th. Every adult (over the age of 18) is asked to fill out their own individual RSVP.
Arrival time and our place in the parade lineup will be announced closer to the event

Register

Reading and Q&A with Noam Sienna
2023-06-07 19:00 - 20:00
Join us and Noam Sienna for a reading and discussion of some of the sources from his anthology, A Rainbow Thread. A Rainbow Thread brings together queer Jewish texts from the 1st century to the 20th century. Following the discussion, we will have the opportunity to ask him additional questions.
Date: Wednesday, June 7
Time: 7:00 pm ET, 6:00 pm CT, 4:00 pm PT
Dr. Noam Sienna is an educator, artist, and scholar of Jewish history and culture, focusing especially on Jewish life in the premodern Islamic world. He completed his PhD at the University of Minnesota in 2020, and is currently a Visiting Assistant Professor in Religion at St. Olaf College in Northfield, Minnesota. His first book, A Rainbow Thread: An Anthology of Queer Jewish Texts from the First Century to 1969 (Print-O-Craft Press, 2019), received the 2020 Reference Award from the Association of Jewish Libraries and the 2020 Anthology Award from the Lambda Literary Foundation.
Register below to receive the Zoom link.

2023 Brooklyn Pride Seudah Shlishit
2023-06-10 16:00 - 18:30
Saturday, June 10
4:00 – 6:30 pm
Celebrate Brooklyn Pride with Eshel! Get to know other Orthodox LGBTQ+ Jews in your neighborhood.
Join us for a light Seudah Shlishit and refreshments at the home of Shlomo Ashkinazy, on Saturday, June 10, between Brooklyn’s Pride Fest and Pride Parade. Conveniently located with a view of the street fair, and walkable from Crown Heights, Bushwick, Fort Green, Prospect Heights, and more. Registration required.
Brooklyn Pride Street Fair:
Park Slope – From Union St to 9th St along 5th Avenue
11 AM to 5 PM
Brooklyn Pride Parade:
5th Avenue from Lincoln Place to 9th St
7:00 PM

Jew York Pride
2023-06-25
Join us on Sunday, June 25th, for a festive community bagel brunch from 10am to 12pm hosted in Midtown, Manhattan (exact location provided after registration, for security reasons), followed by the opportunity to march together in the NYC Pride March. Register here

It's Not About the Bakery: How to Be an Ally to the LGBTQ+ Community
2023-07-09 19:30 - 21:00
Join Eshel for an intimate, sensitive discussion on how to be an Orthodox ally to the LGBTQ+ community in West Orange. We all have more to learn about how we can be supportive to LGBTQ+ people in Orthodox communities.
Join us Sunday, July 9 at 7:30 pm in West Orange at the home of a parent of an LGBTQ+ child for a thought-provoking conversation led by Eshel Executive Director Miryam Kabakov.
This event is for anyone who is an ally or looking to learn more, families of LGTBQ+ people, and members of the LGBTQ+ community within the West Orange Orthodox community.
This event is now full. Sign up below to hear about future events like this one.

Eshel New York City LGBTQ+ Meetup
2023-07-10 19:30 - 21:00
Calling all adult members of the NYC queer community who are Orthodox, formerly Orthodox, or “Ortho-curious.” If you are interested in connecting with other individuals who are exploring their Orthodox LGBTQ+ identity please join us! Members will have the opportunity to mingle and engage in peer-led discussions in a casual and confidential environment.
WHAT: A confidential gathering for people who identify as LGBTQ+ and are Orthodox, Ortho-curious, or formerly Orthodox.
WHEN: The first Monday of every month | 7:30 – 9:00 PM
WHERE: For notifications and sign-in information, please sign up below. (You only need to register for this group one time.)
Questions? Email new-york@eshelonline.org.
Participants are asked to adhere to strict confidentiality.

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In-Person Israel Chapter Meetup
2023-07-11 19:00 - 21:00
Join other members of Eshel’s Israel Chapter Tuesday, July 11 at 7:00pm for a dairy potluck dinner in Beit Shemesh. Open to parents and family members of LGBTQ+ people.
Please sign up even if you’ve previously joined the group so we know who to expect!

Eshel LGBTQ+ Phone-in Support Group
2023-07-19 21:00 - 22:00
What: Join this anonymous phone-in support group for LGBTQ+ individuals who are unable to attend one of our in-person sessions.
When: Fourth Wednesday of every month | 9:00 PM EST
Where: For notifications and sign-in information, please register below. (You only need to register for this group one time.)
Questions? Email info@eshelonline.org

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Day on Fire Island
2023-07-30
Join Eshel for a Sunday outing on Fire Island! Eshel’s Board President, Shlomo Ashkinazy, and his husband, Michael Gomillion have generously invited Eshel members to join them on Sunday, July 30, in their rented beach house in Cherry Grove on Fire Island.
Spend the day enjoying all that Fire Island has to offer, and enjoy a potluck lunch with the Eshel community at 1:00pm! Please bring a kosher dairy or pareve dish to share that serves at least 6. The rest of the day is yours to plan – feel free to use Shlomo and Michael’s place as a central spot for meeting up, resting, eating, bathroom breaks, and washing up between activities. If there’s enough interest, we also may host mincha.
Cherry Grove offers a variety of opportunities for fun activities to choose from, including:

Beautiful Beach
Hotel Pool
Nature Walks
Extremely Friendly Community
Live Cabaret Pool Show at 3PM
Live show in The Hotel’s Ice Palace Cabaret/Disco at 6PM

Don’t forget to bring:

swimsuit
towel
beach blanket
sandals
sunscreen
sunglasses

Note: Cherry Grove is a world famous, predominantly LGBT Community, with a reputation for skimpy attire and occasional nudity. Much of the entertainment includes off-color humor, and coarse language. This event is not recommended for people who may be sensitive to such material.
How to Get There:
Cherry Grove is located on Fire Island, and is accessible by Ferry from the Ferry Terminal in Sayville, Long Island. Round Trip Ferry Fare is $18.
Travel to Sayville, Long Island via the Long Island Rail Road from Penn Station. (Mini-Buses transport passengers from the Sayville train depot directly to the Ferry Terminal, a few minutes away)
Sayville can also be reached by car via the Long Island Expressway or the Southern State Parkway. Cars are not allowed in Cherry Grove, so drivers will need to leave their cars in the Parking Lot at the Ferry Terminal and take the Ferry. (Parking is $10 per day)
Expect a minimum of 2 hours travel time from Manhattan.

This event is at capacity. Check out our calendar for more upcoming events.

NJ Parent Picnic
2023-07-30 17:30 - 21:00
Join us on Sunday, July 30th at 5:30 pm for a picnic for Orthodox parents of LGBTQ+ children.
We will meet at the home of Eshel parents in Englewood, NJ. Please bring a kosher dairy or pareve dish to share.
Register to receive location details – one registration per adult.

Orthodox+* People of Trans Experience Support Group
2023-08-01 21:00 - 22:30
Welcome to Eshel’s Meetup!
What: This virtual support group will be a space for people who identify as transgender, non-binary, and gender questioning. All shades of Orthodox including Chareidi, Modern Orthodox, Ex-Orthodox, are welcome to come and share in a safe and confidential virtual group.
When: Meetings will be held on the third Thursday of every month at 9 pm EST – 6 pm PST.
Where: For notifications and sign-in information, please register below. (You only need to register for this group one time.)
This group is confidential: all attendees are required to adhere to the privacy of its members.
About the Group Coordinator
This Eshel Meetup is led by Joshua Avishur, a transgender Orthodox Jew who enjoys connecting with people and embracing the beauty in all individuals. Joshua is a Masters-in-Social-Work student with experience in mentoring LGBTQ+ folk and developing and leading therapy groups for children and individual counseling with at-risk youth. Joshua is also a transgender panel moderator and panelist.

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Israel Parent Meetup
2023-08-16 12:30 - 13:30 | Zoom
Join Eshel’s local chapter in Israel for parents of LGBTQ+ children.
This group will provide support and build community in an intimate, confidential setting in English. This group meets in person most months, with a Zoom meeting once per quarter.
Register below for monthly reminders, links, and location details.

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Eshel’s mission is to create a future for Orthodox lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender individuals, and their families. Through its innovative and culturally sensitive programming, Eshel works with each individual, family, and community in creating a place for their LGBTQ members. Eshel envisions a world where Orthodox LGBTQ individuals can live out their lives in the Orthodox communities of their choice.

Chicago Parents Meetup with R' Steve Greenberg
2023-08-16 19:00 - 21:00
Learn from Rabbi Steve Greenberg and connect with other Orthodox parents of LGBTQ+ children in Chicago!
Join us at the home of Eshel parents in Skokie on Wednesday, August 16 at 7:00 pm for a shiur and discussion led by Rabbi Greenberg.
Orthodoxy is arguably the most diverse of the contemporary Jewish denominations. While the Orthodox response to homosexuality has at times seemed univocal, in fact the record demonstrates much variety.
On the basis of contemporary documents and alongside an Eshel Survey of 250 Orthodox rabbis, Rabbi Steve Greenberg will offer three distinctive portrayals offered by Orthodox rabbis in understanding these human realities.

Sibling Support Group
2023-08-24 21:00 - 22:00
WHAT: A group for Orthodox Jews with lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer siblings seeking community and peer support.We will discuss family dynamics, supporting parents and siblings, navigating the Orthodox community, and advocating for our LGBTQ+ siblings. Whether you have a sibling who just came out or you have known for a long time, this is a space where you can share about your experiences as a sibling and learn from others on a similar journey.
WHEN: Second Thursday of the Month9:00 pm ET8:00 pm CT6:00 pm PT
WHERE: Zoom (register for the link)
Confidentiality Policy: We take confidentiality very seriously. By attending this group, you agree not to disclose the identity of anyone else, or repeat what was shared in the group.

Eshel New York City LGBTQ+ Meetup
2023-09-11 20:00 - 21:00
Calling all adult members of the NYC queer community who are Orthodox, formerly Orthodox, or “Ortho-curious.” If you are interested in connecting with other individuals who are exploring their Orthodox LGBTQ+ identity please join us! Members will have the opportunity to mingle and engage in peer-led discussions in a casual and confidential environment.
WHAT: A confidential gathering for people who identify as LGBTQ+ and are Orthodox, Ortho-curious, or formerly Orthodox.
WHEN: The first Monday of every month | 8:00 – 9:00 PM ET
WHERE: For notifications and sign-in information, please sign up below. (You only need to register for this group one time.)
Questions? Email new-york@eshelonline.org.
Participants are asked to adhere to strict confidentiality.

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Eshel Parents of Trans People & Gender Non-Conforming Support Group
2023-09-19 21:00 - 22:00
What: This group is for traditional Jewish parents who may be struggling with their child’s gender identity and/or wish to connect with other parents like themselves.

When: Tuesday, September 19, 9:00 PM EST – 8:00 PM CST – 6:00 PM PST(Usually 4th Monday every month)
Where: For notifications and sign-in information, please register below. (You only need to register for this group one time.)
Questions? Email info@eshelonline.org

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Israel Parent Meetup
2023-09-20 12:30 - 13:30

Parents Drop-In Support Group
2023-10-02 20:00 - 21:00
Join our drop-in support group for parents! We meet every Wednesday at noon ET and the first Monday every month at 8pm ET.
For notifications and sign-in information, please fill out the form below. (You only need to register for this group one time.)

Sign up to Join

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LGBTQ+ Support Group
2023-10-02 20:00 - 21:00
A confidential space for LGBTQ+ adults who are Orthodox, formerly Orthodox, or Orthodox-adjacent to access peer support, share their experiences, and connect and gain insights from others.

First Monday of the month
8:00 pm ET, 7:00 pm CT, 6:00 pm MT, 5:00 pm PT
Register below for Zoom link and to receive notifications each month.

Baltimore/DC Sukkah Party
2023-10-04 19:00 - 21:00
Get together with our Baltimore/DC Eshel family in the sukkah for an intimate, fun gathering with light nosh, games, and Torah! Please RSVP to let us know you’re coming even if you have already signed up for this group.
WHAT: A party to celebrate Sukkot with your Eshel family.
WHEN: Wednesday, October 4, 7:00-9:00 pm.
WHERE: In the Sukkah! RSVP for address.

Thanks to Our Baltimore/DC Sponsor

Closeted Men's Support Group
2023-10-10 20:00 - 21:00
Connect with other closeted Orthodox men in a welcoming, supportive, and confidential peer support group. This group offers a warm and empathetic environment where you can share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with other LGBTQ+ frum, Jewish men. This is a nonjudgmental space to explore your questions and concerns wherever you are on your journey. We welcome those from all backgrounds, whether you’re Chassidic, Haredi, Yeshivish, modern Orthodox, or not sure where you fit.
Second Tuesday of the month
8:00 pm ET / 7:00 pm CT / 6:00 pm MT / 5:00 pm PT

The Holy Closet at the Manhattan JCC
2023-10-17 19:00 - 21:00
What does the wedding ceremony of two religious Jewish gay men look like? Or a family of two mothers and four children? Or the pregnancy of a religious trans man? This film raises these questions and tells the stories of LGBTQ people who chose to remain religious Jews, building their lives, relationships, families, and everyday activities according to the Jewish faith.
Join us for a screening of The Holy Closet (Aron Hakodesh) followed by a panel discussion on Tuesday, October 17.
Marlene Meyerson JCC Manhattan
Doors open 30 minutes before the event starts.
334 Amsterdam AveNY, NY, 10023

Get Tickets

Israel Parent Meetup
2023-10-18 12:30 - 14:00
Wednesday October 18, 7:30 pm Israel Time
Join Eshel’s local chapter in Israel for parents of LGBTQ+ children.
This group will provide support and build community in an intimate, confidential setting in English. This group meets in person most months, with a Zoom meeting once per quarter.
Register below for monthly reminders, links, and location details.

Sign up for our other newsletters

Eshel’s mission is to create a future for Orthodox lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender individuals, and their families. Through its innovative and culturally sensitive programming, Eshel works with each individual, family, and community in creating a place for their LGBTQ members. Eshel envisions a world where Orthodox LGBTQ individuals can live out their lives in the Orthodox communities of their choice.

Eshel Across America
2023-11-03 - 2023-11-04
What is Eshel Across America?
Eshel Across America is an annual event that we mark on the week of Parshat Vayera to teach the Torah of hachnassat orchim, welcoming guests. Shabbat Vayera has a special place in our heart because it is the source of our name. In this parsha, Abraham plants a tamarisk tree, an eshel. Our midrashic tradition teaches that the eshel that Abraham planted provided shelter and nourishment to travelers in the desert. This echoes the heavy emphasis placed on the mitzvah of welcoming strangers in the parsha, as Abraham and Sarah show generosity in caring for the three mysterious strangers who visit them.
Every year, on Shabbat Vayera, we invite our community to participate in the mitzvah of hachnasat orchim. Beyond simply hosting our friends and family, the mitzvah of hachnassat orchim requires us to expand our boundaries, to make space for those who are different from us around our table.
How Can I Participate?

Invite guests to your Shabbat meal on November 3 or 4! Be mindful of including those who you’ve never hosted before, those who have different backgrounds, demographics, points of view, and life experiences.
Order challah (including rainbow challah!) from our partner, Challah Back Girls to brighten your Shabbat table. Use discount code ESHEL for 15% off your order. (Order by Sunday to guarantee delivery for Shabbat).
Sign up below to receive our discussion guide. Use your Shabbat meal to raise questions and discuss the obligation of welcoming the stranger.

Frequently Asked Questions:
How should I invite guests, even those I may not have met yet?
There are many ways you can opt to invite guests to your table. You might reach out by email or text to send personal invites to those you already know. Online platforms such as OneTable and Evite allow you to share a link to the meal you’re hosting more broadly, such as in local Facebook or Whatsapp groups, and welcome new faces to your table. You can also reach out to Rabbis, community leaders, and friends to identify individuals local to you in need of hospitality.
Do I have to be LGBTQ+ to host an Eshel Across America meal?
No! This year we are opening up Eshel Across America hosting to all – LGBTQ+ people, parents, siblings, friends, and allies. We believe that expanding our Orthodox communities’ awareness and comfort with talking about and sharing space with people who are different from them will help us humanize one another and be more open to conversations about LGBTQ+ experiences.
What if I’m not available that Shabbat or can’t host people in my home?
We encourage you to think creatively about the ways you can create a welcoming space to gather people to practice and discuss hachnassat orchim. Maybe you can host a group on a Thursday night for a mishmar-style preparation for Shabbat, get together in a park or larger space, or gather for a melave malka after Shabbat ends on Saturday night. You can always sign up to receive our discussion questions and use them another time.
Will the meals be Kosher?
We encourage hosts to make their meals kosher, but understand that people may have different standards about what counts as kosher. With that in mind, we ask that hosts make it clear to their guests what the kashrut standards are at their meal (such as whether the meal will be catered, homemade, or potluck-style; meat or dairy; cholov yisroel; etc) so people can make informed decisions about attending. Let us know if you need help making a kosher meal – whether that’s by ordering from a kosher restaurant, cooking in a neighbor’s kitchen, or some other creative alternative.
